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Belief Builds Confidence and Performance
Early on in my career I served as an Outreach Consultant which is an intervention person for high risk middle school students. Because I had a great boss, I learned a lot about how schools ran and many of the challenges students and parents dealt with how those challenges related to school. One of the most important lessons I learned was that kids just need someone to believe in them, and if you do, they will rise. I also learned that adults aren’t much different, if you believe in them, they rise too. One story I like to share with people is the story of a former student named Benny Hernandez. The thought of his first day in middle school brought him anxiety. He was overwhelmed by this giant new school and did not want to do it. On the first day of school, his mother exhausted her influence with him getting him in the car. With his anxiety growing, she drove the car to the school. When the car arrived at the front of the school, Benny was frozen with fear and refused to get out and join his schoolmates. Frustrated, his mother walked onto campus looking for help. She met me in the hallway and explained the story, if I’m being honest, I couldn’t believe this mom needed help getting her kid out of the car but decided to help. In hindsight, sometimes it's much easier for a third person to convince a kid than a parent because many times the parent is the source of much of the anxiety. When I got to the car, I met a short, slightly pudgy kid who was resolute in his desire not to get out of the car. Benny and I chatted for a short while and after being convinced that school would be fun and that I would be there for him, he got out of the car and walked with me to get his schedule. As days passed. I checked in with Benny and each time I saw him in the halls I’d sing part of the Elton John hit, Benny and the Jets, “B..B..B.. Benny!” Okay, I yelled it but it was for a good purpose. He would smile, and keep moving on to his next class. He adjusted to school and was making friends when his father returned into his life. In an effort to reconnect with his son, they decided to take a drive along the levee road just outside of the school limits. Later that day, we got a call that the car had turned over on them and Benny didn’t survive. I get choked up every time I tell or even write this part of the story because I had a connection with him and still think about him often. What keeps me comforted when I think about young Benny is the fact that I did what I could to make his life a little better with the time I had. It made a difference for him at the time, and it does for me now. This same principle works at work. Making sure that people know that you believe in them fuels their confidence in themselves to do what they need to do and give their very best. People give what’s called discretionary effort when they are motivated, instead of just enough, the effort they give when they are unmotivated. The writers at Forbes.com encourage leaders to believe in their employees to “get outstanding performance from ordinary human beings.” According to the Forbes writers, “If you wait for a team of superstars, you will be waiting forever. Discover what each person does best. Find better ways for people to support each other. Bring people together to support and encourage each other. Then believe 100% in these partnerships and collaborations”. In work places where contracts and tenure dictate termination procedures, it's difficult and politically costly to terminate an employee so leaders have to find ways to work with them before thinking dismissal. It is in these types of workplaces that a leader’s ability to work with difficult people is most necessary. Strategies such as believing in your employees can be used anywhere. A poor carpenter blames his tools. I often run into leaders who accept a leadership position and immediately begin judging their employees harshly. They hear stories about employees and use these narratives to define who’s good, who’s bad, and who’s ineffective. Making judgements about people before getting to know them is the equivalent of a carpenter expecting his tools to do the work. The tools are nothing until the carpenter arrives and starts working. An ineffective employee doesn’t need your judgement, they need your leadership. Harsh judgement of others may make people in the “in crowd” feel special (see ego) but it doesn’t help the team. Vernon Davis retired from the Washington Redskins at the end of the 2019 season. In 2008, while playing for the San Francisco 49ers, he lost the confidence of his coach who benched him and told the media he wanted “winners”. The conflict between the coach and Vernon Davis got so bad and public that in general people thought Davis was washed up. By 2011, the 49ers hired a new coach who believed in Vernon Davis. Having a coach who believed in him, and coached him expecting that he would be successful yielded success. The same player who lost one head coach’s confidence, was benched, and would have been thrown off the team if not for an expensive contract was now a team leader. In 2013, the football world saw who Vernon Davis credited with success after scoring a touchdown, and emotional Vernon Davis leaves the field in tears and into the arms of his coach. To be fair, I’m sure there is responsibility on both sides of the kerfuffle between Davis and his coach, for this article I just want to point out that having the confidence of the leader matters. The other side of having the boss’ confidence is not having the boss’ confidence. And an employee not knowing if they have the boss’ confidence is just as bad as not having it. In both situations, fear and insecurity occupies the mind, words, and behavior. The result is the resentment, undermining conduct, and workplace incivility. You won’t need to scream Elton John lyrics for all to hear to get the Vernon Davis effect. You won’t need to but you might do it anyway. If you want to get outstanding performance, you will need to extend your confidence to all members of your team. I have to warn that not everyone will be on board. No matter who you are or what you do you won’t get 100% buy in so that should never be the goal. And don’t expect daily affirmations to turn your every employee into Lebron James, but it is reasonable to expect that they would do better and be a source of less frustration on the leader. I learned about the Vernon Davis effect through Benny Hernandez, a former student who’s confidence grew as ours did in him. Whether it's Benny, Vernon Davis, or an employee on your team, the principle is the same, believe in them and they will believe in themselves. Do that and you will SOAR! William A. Brown July 26, 2020 https://www.forbes.com/pictures/5716950da7ea43722d7811a2/believe-in-your-employees/#2e67a276201a
Comments : Very good read, I love reading material that makes me want to dig deeper and re-read: And I learned a new word. " kerfuffle"
07-31-2020